Making Moves: "Electric Lady" by Janelle Monae

2017 has been a year of 'making moves' for me. Seriously, there has been major changes on just about every front for me: mental, physical, financial, career, family.... truly change seems to be the only constant. Well....change and creativity. I swear it has been my writing and art that has gotten me through many a dark day.

My friends have also been absolute pillars of support. I want to give special shout outs to Gerry Walker, Gina Fluharty, Delilah Marvelle, Jessica Smith, Jessa Slade, Mary Buckham, EJ Russell, and the folks at The Clockwork Rose Tea Emporium  for helping me remain sane by listening to my crazy ideas / stories and for occasionally sharing tiny cakes (Clockwork Rose, Jessa, Jessie, & Delilah), words of wisdom (Gerry, Mary, & EJ), and bottles of gin (Gina, of course).

I am most thankful for my mentor, Pat Adamosky. Pat is the reason I now live in Oregon. He brought me back into the electrical industry after being gone for about a year. He has had faith in my abilities from day one and seen more talent in me than I often see in myself. Pat is the sanity check in my chaotic career and the biggest cheerleader a budding entrepreneur could ever hope for. We just had a lovely dinner at Bethany's Table and I have a ton to think about, but in Pat's words:

"It won't be easy, but we're going to have fun."

So true, my friend...so TRUE! 

Now to dust off my MBA business plan and get busy. More to come as things develop.

Peace & Love!

"Electric Lady" by Janelle Monae

I relate to Ms. Monae's music on so many levels.....from her love of dance and thick rhythms to her musical sci-fi styled storytelling.... she is the embodiment of Afrofuturism. LOVE. HER.

"Wearing tennis shoes or in flats or in stilettos, Illuminating all that she touches, eye on the sparrow, A modern day Joan of her Arc..."

Me in my old office....so glad to be outta there....

Finishing My Novel: "Ain't It Fun" by Paramore

Question: "How do you eat a whale?"

Answer: "One bite at a time."

Now, I personally haven't actually 'eaten a whale', but I have finished writing a novel....novels, in fact. I have also finished several HUGE creative projects and continue to find news ones to tackle.

People often ask me, "Where do you find the time to do ______________ ?" <writing, painting, sewing, or whatever project of mine we happen to be discussing> I'll be honest and say that I've never been one to sit idle - well, even if I'm sitting still, my brain is still churning out ideas and stories. The plain and simple truth is that I HAVE to do something creative everyday or I feel like my head will explode. Some people feel the same way about exercise. (Why couldn't I be blessed with that specific drive? Ha!)

It never fails, whenever I first sit down to start devouring a new whale I feel a swirling mix of anticipation, excitement, and (dare I say it) dread. Standing in front of that blank canvas or sitting in front of the blinking cursor in a blank document, I always pause to give myself time to fully commit to the task in front of me. I will toil for weeks on this project and I have to be 'in it to win it.'

Eventually, the engineer in me kicks in....when writing, I start an Excel spreadsheet to track my daily word count and progress towards my goal. When painting, my inner engineer envisions the finish project and deconstructs the object to methodically produce a plan of attack.

Finishing is critical. How else can you learn and improve if you don't complete the process? Especially with writing, often the last bits take an unexpected turn that requires some pre-seeding in the parts you wrote months ago.

I finished writing my third manuscript this spring, took a month off to let it marinate, then started editing and polishing. By the end of summer, it was ready to go out for submittal to my short list of dream agents.

And now, I wait.

Waiting for a reply is the worst part of this process. Agents and editors are busy people. They have bills to pay, clients to meet, and networks to groom. And like any job, you give attention to the projects that are making money, not the slush pile that might bear fruit. Mostly, I submitted to folks who requested my work via one-on-one meetings and pitch sessions at conferences. I also submitted to agents recommended to me by one of their authors. My hope is that these meetings and personal recommendations will keep my manuscript out of the general slush pile.

But still...I wait.

And let me tell you, patience is beyond a virtue. Patience is tortured anguish, wrapped in calm frustration, drenched with silence.

Still, I find solace in that fact that I FINISHED another book....and that, my friends, is farther than most make it on this journey to publication.

"Ain't It Fun" by Paramore

I love it when a song's lyrics reveal a deeper and opposite meaning to what I initially thought. Like when a mellow song has biting lyrics or when a peppy song is about depression. Songs that immediately come to mind are "Linger" by The Cranberries, "No Rain" by Blind Melon, and now "Ain't It Fun" by Paramore.

Like this song laments the realities of growing up, as a writer you quickly learn how hard it is to get traditionally published in today's market. Now, before you put on your rose colored glasses and question why I'm not self-pubbing - trust me when I say that in many ways self-pubbing is more work than the traditional route IF you want to do it well. In the end, this is my dream and hope for a new career path - so I really can't complain...too much.  :D

"Don't go crying to your mama, 'cause you're on your own in the real world..."

Miner's masks for my latest steampunk adventure!

Time: "Time (Clock of the Heart)" by Culture Club

Time is truly a precious thing.  Yes, time is money, as well as any number of time related cliches, but most importantly time is finite....once it's passed, it's gone. The sci-fi nerd in me wants to launch into a discussion about parallel dimensions, time tracks, time travel, and worm holes.  But for the sake of this blog post, let's stick to one timeline and one plane of existence.  :D

Last week, I was offered a job at a different company than my current day job. To say that this new job included a boat load of money and perks, when compared to my current job, would be an understatement.  I found myself torn over the possibilities of starting fresh at a new company, what I would do with all that money, and how my daily life would change....dramatically. It's that last point that tied my stomach in knots and kept me up at night for days.

You see, this new job was with the company I worked for several years ago. I left that company for VERY specific reasons. Yes, they pay well, but in return they are overly demanding of your time. I remember one manager fretting over the fact that part of his family vacation included a few days on a cruise ship without wi-fi. "I'll just have to pay for some sort of satellite modem," he said.  Now I know I'm dating myself, but the main point is that this guy was genuinely worried about missing an important email - and yes, dear reader, this was the norm among all the workers!

So I paused and asked myself, "Do I really want to buy a one-way ticket on that Looney Tunes train to Crazy Town?" My evenings would be spent sending emails and catching up on work that I didn't have time to finish during normal working hours. Mornings, my usual writing time, would be spent talking with east coast contacts to expedite orders and get answers to technical questions. During the interview, my potential coworker stated that he wakes up to at least  fifty-two emails each morning that he tries to answer before her goes into the office - are you kidding me?

Which all brought me to the questions: "Who would I become, if I took this job?" and "Do I really want to be that person?"

After hemming and hawing for a week, a dear friend gave me some good advice. Over beers and burgers he simply said, "Don't take the job. It's not worth it. It's not worth sacrificing your writing."

I finished my pint, tore up my ticket to Crazy Town, and for the first night in days I slept like the dead. My time and my writing are more important to me.  Who would I become, if I took that job? Certainly NOT the person I truly want to be.

"Time (Clock of the Heart)" by Culture Club

Aaaahhh, Culture Club! Boy George in all his 80's, eyeshadowed glory. My best friend, Noel, dressed up as Boy George for Halloween in the fourth grade.

Culture Club was on the front line of yet another British music invasion. This time, they were armed with fresh videos that seemed to stream constantly on MTV. Aaaaaahhhh, MTV - remember when all they used to play were music videos and live concert recordings???

Anyhow, check out this video and let me know what you think. I have to admit that when I watched it for this post I started laughing. Today was the first time that I noticed the fact that their backup singers are wearing clock faces around their necks. I'm from Ohio, so all this time I assumed they were wearing some wacky Amish-Quaker-Puritan costume. How that all related to time, I'll never know - and it doesn't matter, cause I was just as wrong as two left shoes!  LOL!

"Time, won't give me time..."

Gag gift - Homicide Murder Board, complete with red string, I made for a friend's birthday.
Nope, I wouldn't have time for such projects if I'd taken that job.

Happy New Year: "Cheers (Drink to That) by Rihanna

Let me just say, for the record, that I have some of the most amazing and coolest friends on the planet.  No, really, I do.  The best part is that we simply crack each other up!  As a mechanical engineer, I've spent most of my adult life surrounded by men.  (No offense, guys, but the testosterone can get kinda thick in corporate enclaves.  The competition is intense and you guys can be rather disgusting - pass the Lysol wipes, please! - I still loves ya, tho!)

So, when I moved to Portland and joined The Rose City Romance Writers (the local Romance Writers of America chapter), I found myself in an unusual spot - surrounded by women.  And not just any group of women.... an incredibly smart, gleefully raucous, somewhat naughty, empowered, business savvy group of women (with a handful of guys, too.) <Yes - men write romance!>  And, most importantly, we are all going after our dream of being successful authors.

Aaaaahhhh, the estrogen!

Now I know some of you are thinking, "There has to be some cattiness."  Well, not as much as you might think.  Good energy has a way of dispelling bad.  They have all been very generous with their time and expertise.  I feel like I have really found my clique.

Our next meeting is this weekend and I'm excited to see my chapter mates.  Some of us 'wrote in' the new year together at a local cafe.  This celebration through writing was the second year we've done it.  (Thanks Jessie for coordinating it!)  It sets a nice tone for the year ahead.  Sadly, no alcohol was involved.

As a writer, it is so easy to just sit in a corner and create your own worlds on a page.  I am blessed to have such great folks in my life.  One of my goals for this year is to spend more time with my friends.  You have to live life to write about it.

"Cheers (Drink to That)" by Rihanna

Though I have featured two of Rihanna's songs on my mix tape, I don't necessarily consider myself to be a Rihanna fan.  I think she is talented and beautiful, but violence against women....well - let me stop myself from commenting any further.

Anyhow - I love the spirit of the song.  Especially the line: "Don't let the bastards get you down..."  Given my background, that phrase should be emblazoned on a banner and hung in my office.  Ha!  I also enjoy the expression of warm friendships, the trials of life on the road, and a need to unwind / cut loose so adequately depicted in the video.  (If you haven't seen it, click on the video link above.  I'm sure you'll enjoy it.)

Once again, Ms. Rihanna is sporting some heels that I would break my neck in, if I even attempted to wear them!

"Cheers to the freakin' weekend, I drink to that...."

My crazy, dear, sweet friends: Delilah Marvelle 'helping' Jessa Slade with her latest manuscript.

50 Shades: "S&M" by Rihanna

Well, let me be honest and admit that I am often slow off the mark, when it comes to reading extremely popular fiction.  My boss, another avid reader, hounded me for two years to read The Hunger Games series. I didn't start reading Harry Potter until book four was out.  And I randomly picked up book six of the Charlaine Harris Sookie Stackhouse Series, because I liked the tiger on the cover.  :D

So last April, during the RT Booklovers Convention, when everyone was a buzz over 50 Shades of Grey, I thought, "Yeah, I'll never read it.  If it's that popular, it can't be that good."  Yup - that would make me a "snob."  I'll admit that my tastes tend to veer towards lesser known authors, who write works with interesting, unexpected, and intelligent twists.  But even the biggest health nut occasionally eats a candy bar....plus, the author and business woman inside of me wanted to see what all the fuss was about.  This week, I shushed my inner book snob and purchased the Nook book version of the first book in the 50 Shades series.

Many of my writing friends and several bloggers have ripped this book to shreds.  Lashing out (pun intended) that it is poorly written and that Ana (the heroine) is 'too stupid to live.'  While some of their comments are pure hateration, I see their point....I mean, how many times can one use the word "hot" and not annoy critical readers.  But, considering that it started out as fan fiction and grew into a phenomenon - I have to give E. L. James points.  Specifically, for her execution of character development.  I am currently reading book three, NOT because of the BDSM, but because I am eager to see how Christian overcomes his demons.  I've seen so many of my friends swoon at the mere mention of the name Christian Grey then comment on how he just needs TLC.  THAT, my friends, is called creating a great character!  He elicits an emotional response....need I say more?

Side note: Besides the over use of the word "hot", my other distraction is the fact that when I read Ana's endearment of "Fifty", mentally I hear "Fiddy" - as in the rapper, 50 Cent.  Now, Mr. 50 Cent has a wonderful smile and amazing laugh - wish us fans could see more of those elements of his personality, but then again, I'm not one for following celebrities....I've got my own life to live.  But when I think "Fiddy" I have to pause and refocus, before I continue reading.  LOL!

"S&M" by Rihanna

Oh, my....

Take my word for it, doing a Youtube search for S&M without adding  Rihanna's name to the search text can lead you down a dark rabbit hole.  Then, once I found Rihanna's video, I had to make sure I found the 'official' video without fan edited - ahem - extras.

Somehow, I felt this song and video was more than fitting.  And while I don't consider myself to be a prude, some of the images are a little more than interesting.  Rihanna is beautiful, of course, and she really knows how to work a latex outfit and blue lipstick.  Plus, I would surely fall and break my neck (or at least badly twist my ankle) in the heels / boots she gracefully runs around in during this video. <sigh>

The song is very dance-able.  I do love the tone of empowerment - she knows what she likes and she's not afraid to admit it - explicitly.

"Come on, Come on, Come on - I like it, like it..."

Crazy Week: "Rollercoaster of Love" by Red Hot Chili Peppers

This past week was a real roller coaster ride, full of emotional highs and lows.  Unlike the song I chose for this week, there weren't any affairs of the heart involved (for me), but there was plenty of drama brewing and boiling over.

I guess, the overall theme for the week would be: Lost and Found Opportunities.

At work: a co-worker's poor judgement led to their termination.  They were a really nice person, smart, with unlimited possibilities....but one horrible choice led to their demise.  I mourned the termination of my friend.  (I hope they land on their feet, despite the poor state of our economy.)  But at they same time, I recognize that it was their decisions that led them to this exact place and time.

Personally: two of my dearest friends cancelled their wedding.  It is true, that it is better for the decision to be made now than to find themselves in divorce proceedings later.  However, this fact doesn't make sending out "the wedding is off" notices, returning gifts, and separating any easier.  He made the choice.  She has to move out.  They have to heal.  Sounds simple, but the reality is much more messy.  We, the friends of both, are struggling, too.  How do you help one without offending the other?  The truly sad part is that they do, indeed, love each other and that the wedding was only two weeks away.

So, those are the lows of the week.  The high points were wonderful!  I reconnected with a dear friend who now lives in Oregon.  Another sweet voice from the past sent me a warm message from California.  My family is doing beyond well, they are awesome!  We had a team lunch, to celebrate the launch of a new product, at the Portland City Grill.  I am starting a new project researching opportunities in Latin America.  And I hung out with my writing friends at a book signing at my favorite indy bookstore, Jan's Paperbacks.

My hope is that I am now entering a period of calm.  Soooo much negative energy was swirling this week, it's time to get some positive juices flowing!

"Rollercoaster of Love" by Red Hot Chili Peppers

The original version of this song was titled Love Rollercoaster and was a huge hit for the R&B funk band The Ohio Players in 1975.  Given the fact that I was born and raised in Ohio, this song was played often on the radio in my youth.

One of my favorite bands, Red Hot Chili Peppers, covered this song in 1996 for the film Beavis and Butt-head Do America.  This film is not anything to write home about, but the Chili Pepper's cover of Love Rollercoaster is a real treat.

"Your love is like, a roller coaster, baby, baby...."

View from our private dining room at the Portland City Grill.

What memories does this song bring to your mind?  Let me know - leave a comment below.

Sipping Pinot: "Red Red Wine" by UB40

It's a very rare occurrence for me to give up some portion of my weekend to hang out with customers.  I am typically on the road so much that my weekends at home are savoured like tiny morsels of Swiss chocolate.  Now, when I say that I stay 'home', that doesn't mean that I stay 'in' my house.  I usually have plans with friends or go exploring.  There are always loads of things to do in Portland.

So when an important client informed me that he was flying his wife in for the weekend after a few days of meetings, my co-workers and I went to work on planning a day of wine tasting and making lists of recommended sites for the balance of their stay. 

I work with a great group of folks and many are now dear friends.  We cover each other's backs and have fun along way.  My clients just happened to be great people, too.  As the wine and conversation flowed, we all realized that our client/vendor relationship had morphed into friendship.

At the end of the day, people do business with people. 

And, naturally, people prefer to do business with people they like.

"Red Red Wine" by UB40

So...I hadn't actually noticed, until now, that the lead singer is actually drinking beer and NOT wine in this video.  It was the 80's...was anyone concerned about continuity (or color coordination) back then? I mean, REALLY?

Though this song is about drowning your broken heart in glasses of red wine, it remains one of my favorite summer songs.  It's also great for workout cool downs.

"Red, red, wiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnneeee....."

Wine and yummy snacks at Colleen Coleman Winery.



What memories does this song bring to your mind?  Let me know - leave a comment below.

Manners: "I'm Afraid of Americans" by David Bowie (feat Nine Inch Nails)

Simple question here....What happened to manners?  Are parents teaching and enforcing manners in their homes?  I am sure that many bloggers have written rants about the demise of our culture and the downfall of our society due to our lack of etiquette.  I DO NOT believe that we are going to hell in a hand basket, but I do think that technology has inhibited our ability to empathize with our fellow man.  It's just way too easy to post a mean spirited soliloquy when you can remain shrouded by a goofy screen name.

Take the Denver movie theatre shootings, as an example....I am floored that some online comments have questioned the manhood and bravery of the folks in the theatre.  It's real easy to play "Monday Quarterback" and talk about what you 'would have done' IF you were in the theatre.  My bet is that unless you are combat, special ops, or police trained, you would run for cover - that's called being human...It's a real basic 'fight or flight' response.

A little closer to home, for me, has been some of the comments posted about my friend Elle Zober.  Elle is a beautiful, funny, and creative soul.  She has an AMAZING eye for photography.  In fact, she took the picture that I use for my profile.  Elle is recently divorced and is trying to sell her home.  She found a very creative way to market her house in a near dead housing market.  Her sign has garnered national media attention....it has also garnered vicious comments on her website, blog, and voicemail.  Who are you (cyber bullies)?  And why do you feel a need to comment on anyone's weight, looks, or marriage?

The wild thing is that all of this negativity is completely unnecessary.  Just say, "I'm sorry for your loss." and move on, no other opinions are needed or required.

"I'm Afraid of Americans" by David Bowie (feat Nine Inch Nails)

I love this song and the associated video.  I have long been a David Bowie fan and the addition of Trent Reznor's driving score only enhances the underlying tension in "I'm Afraid of Americans" lyrics. Plus, Mr. Reznor lends his spooky presence as 'Johnny' in the video.

As a writer and artist, I believe in freedom of speech.  I also believe that God is watching over us and holds us accountable for what's in our hearts.  And I know that 'karma is a bitch'.

"I'm afraid of Americans..."

Tales from the Road: "The Warrior" by Patty Smyth and Scandal

In the past, I've had jobs that were more than 85% travel.  Just think, 85% of my life was spent away from home on business trips.  With all of my gold, silver, and platinum levels on various airlines and at a number of hotel chains, I was pretty much treated like a queen where ever I roamed.  I remember one trip to Orlando, Florida where the hotel clerk and I bonded over the fact that she was also from Ohio.  She upgraded me to their penthouse suite...the room was large enough to comfortably accommodate ten people, plus servants....good times, at no extra charge. 

Needless to say, I was a card carrying member of the 'Road Warrior' ranks for almost ten years. 

TEN YEARS! 

I still look back on those days and wonder how I survived living out of a suitcase.  I eventually quit that job when I realized that I had friends all over the world, but no one to have coffee with while I was actually at home.  {If you haven't seen that movie Up in the Air (aka Mileage, My Life in Japan) starring the ever yummy George Clooney, check it out if you want a feel for what road warrior life is really like.  The scene where he returns to a drab apartment with an empty fridge, after living it up at a posh hotel, was my reality.  My sister even commented once, on the state of the contents of my refrigerator, "You've got gourmet, chocolate covered, dried cherries and no milk!"}

In my current job, I am a Director of Business Development for a technical products manufacturer.  I'm worse than a geek...I'm a geek with an MBA.  And now I am back on the road, but NOT 85% of the time.

When thinking about my business travel, song choices like Willie Nelson's "On the Road Again" and Elton John's "Rocket Man" would have made perfect sense, but they are also totally predictable. I chose "The Warrior" by Patty Smyth and Scandal, because I felt fearless this week.

"The Warrior" by Patty Smyth and Scandal

This week, I traveled to Boston for a SunSpec Alliance event and site visits.  I found myself climbing on rooftops looking at solar cell array installations with a group of funny electricians, engineers, and all around techno weenies.  I fought against my vertigo to gain access to an amazing view of downtown Boston.

Looking at all of my stuff laid out in my hotel room brought back memories of my road warrior days.  I hummed "The Warrior" to myself all week....well that and Tina Turner's "We Don't Need Another Hero" - but that's another story for a different post.

I love the video for "The Warrior" in all it's 80's glory!  I'm not sure of why her hair and make up gets wilder and wilder as the video progresses - I guess this is her transformation into the warrior, but she seems pretty darn bad ass from the start.  My favorite dancer is that guy lounging in the ropes...the net dancers are a close second....they coulda skipped the interlude with the iridescent, plastic girl, though.  The whole song and video just oozes with 80's 'girl power' and for this reason, it will always have a cozy place in my heart.  Cheers to all of the road warriors and rocket (wo)men out making money for themselves and their businesses!

"I AM the warrior....Victory is MINE..."

View from my hotel room in Boston.